Oh hi there.
I’m managing to write from my new office – MY. NEW. OFFICE.
No more balancing laptops and iPads on my knee, no longer am I squashed into a box room attempting to edit pictures in the worst light ever and finally there’s some space for me to shoot photos properly.
I can’t believe it, even now, but we moved into our new house three weeks ago. I’m constantly having to remind myself that we’re no longer owners of a 2 bed flat, but we now have a full blown house with a garden, and a garage and plenty of space for 8392 shoes and my ever growing coat collection.
It’s kinda hard to explain, but on one hand the house is so familiar now I’m used to swanning around the various different rooms doing the ironing or whizzing the hoover round [check me out, wife in the making] but then the next day I’m like ‘woah, I have a 6 seater dining set IN MY KITCHEN, when the heck did that happen I’m so old rahrahrah’.
Sometimes, I wake up feeling like I’m on holiday; I’m still going into each room like ‘THE TILES JAMES, THE TILES we need to find out where they’re from’ and ‘I wish our living room was this shape we are so squashed in RN’.
It’s kinda like I’m expecting a call any time soon from a property agent telling me to get out of this holiday home because erm, it’s been 3 weeks now and LOL I can’t stay here forever.
But I suppose that’s a good thing, we’ve spent this past year working so hard on saving and waiting for this house that I’m constantly thinking to myself flippin’ heck Charlotte, you worked so hard for this don’t start taking it for granted.
“Flippin’ heck Charlotte, you worked so hard for this don’t start taking it for granted”
So I guess I can apologise again for taking some time out from writing. My brain has been so full of house and moving crap that literally I haven’t had time to think about anything else.
I mean, I haven’t even managed to paint my nails or put a face mask on in about 3 weeks ugh I’m a disgusting human being right?
And I haven’t even remembered any of those really stupid things which are kinda essential as well, like suddenly recalling how picky you are about towel rails (it’s the first thing people see when they walk into the bathroom James, pls don’t judge me), or realising that IKEA wardrobes are a nightmare to put up and take 6892 man hours and multiple cups of tea.
Plus, can we talk about toilet roll holders. I mean, not are they only like £10+ nowadays but when you need to buy three, a small part of me is crying and trying not to think about how much make up I could buy with that kinda dolla.
Also, this is summin’ else no one fills you in on when you move house – you kinda lose your identity a bit. I had a moment a couple of weeks ago where I was looking at all of my bits and bobs and thinking that, for some reason, I don’t fit into this house.
Which sounds ridiculous because hello, this is my house.
“You kinda lose your identity a bit, I had this moment where I was thinking that for some reason, I don’t fit into this house”
But when we were in the flat, it had it’s own identity – it was cool, imaginative and James and I had to think about a million ways to make a small space work without making it look like we were living in cramped conditions or had bulky furniture – ultimately my worst nightmare is a house feeling cluttered.
Whereas now I feel like we have to alter our style to fit into this big ol’ house. The quirky day bed looks lost in its room, the corner sofa is no more and we had to say sayonara and leave behind the bespoke breakfast bar that James made for us. Sob.
And I’m second guessing the furniture that does fit – everything seems to be either white or grey and with the white washed walls and the white kitchen cabinets I’m like er, shall we get a bit of colour in here or summin summin. So my priorities have gone out the window, I’ve easy spent most of my leftover money on cushions and colourful prints rather than stuff than we actually need and I’m starting to think we’re never going to get this house ready anytime soon.
I even had a moment last week where I started even bringing my wardrobe into question cus FFS even my clothes don’t match the rest of my house. This grown up, mature and responsible house and I’m still wearing clothes that 2012 Charlotte woulda been proud of. Standard.
I need to remind myself that this is exciting; this is actually THE BEST opportunity I have to decide who I want to be. A house redesign and a new wardrobe could give me the chance to think about what kind of a person I’m aspiring to be, particularly as this house is going to see me through becoming a married woman and even further into the future… cripes.
I am SO glad to be writing again. Since all of the house move has been going on, taking some time out from writing [er, mostly because my mac and camera has been in boxes] has given me some time to reflect over some stuff that’s happened over the past few months.
But hey, that’s another post, another day.